Archive for June 19th, 2010

Maybe it’s Just You

June 19th, 2010 by Steve

We all have bad days. It just feels sometimes like no matter what you do, how you feel or what energy you put out into the universe, that you just have a bad day. Hopefully the bad days are few and far between, and after the bad day you can put it behind you and move on. At least that is how it should be and feel.

Do you find yourself having bad day after bad day? One bad interaction with a rude sales person, mean boss or snippy waiter after another? Do you feel the world is against you? Are you always fighting the good fight, not letting people take advantage of you? Do you stand your ground and fight in order to feel righteous?

Well, I don’t like to say it but I will…. maybe it’s just you.

I have always seen God as a facilitator, a parent who supports His children by giving them the tools to live any kind of life they choose. I have never seen God as someone who plays favorites or chooses one to suffer while another lives in luxury. Those choices, I believe, are up to us. We choose the type of life we want to lead.

We choose how the world perceives us and how we perceive the world. I have many friends and acquaintances who live in very similar circumstances to me. They have similar jobs, income, education, families, etc. So our environments both physically and socially are pretty much the same. Yet they have the worse days. Every day is filled with someone trying to ‘get one over on them’ or some ‘rude waiter’ or some ‘idiot that cut them off.’ I rarely see or experience these things. I’m not immune from them but generally I have very few bad days. Am I that lucky? Are my friends who suffer from bad days that unlucky?

Did God choose me and say: “He is one of my favorites, so he gets to have easy and fortunate days”?  As much as I’d like to think that God did choose me for an easy life, I think I choose it myself. I am not removing God from the equation. God provides me the power and energy to manifest the easy life I think I deserve but, in the end, God gives me what I choose.

As I hear about the negative experiences my friends have, I keep coming back to the same two questions: “Why did you choose to have this experience? And why are you choosing to have it over and over?” For an answer I always look to my life and experience. If they occupy the same environment as me and they have these bad experiences, then I must be doing something so that I don’t have them.

How do you go from being a negative person to someone that always has great days? The answers are not easy. I will touch on them briefly but will have to expand on each with its own article in due time.

    1. Your Perception: It starts with your perception of the world around you. How do you react to your environment? A good example of this is in young children who have not had the life experience of adults and often tease or make fun of other children. If you look closely, you’ll notice that they rarely pick on kids who are not bothered.  They almost always pick on kids who are bothered because they are looking for that reaction to feed something inside themselves that they do not get elsewhere. If you react negatively to people (which more often than not are the cause of the bad situations), then more attacks will come your way so those people can feed off your negative reaction. On the other hand, if you react positively or don’t react at all, you will soon see that the negative people in your life will take less of an interest in you. If they are in a negative space, they want you there too. If you won’t join them, they will stop trying and find someone who will. As the saying goes, “misery loves company.” If you cannot perceive a loving, caring world you will forever experience a life of ‘bad days.’

      Start changing your perception today. When faced with someone negative, don’t get sucked in. Instead, react positively and show them love and understanding. It may drive you crazy at first because you will want to put up your shields and fight.  But it is easier to let energy flow past you than to put up a wall and resist it. Imagine standing in a river or a gust of wind and you face it head on. You feel its force pushing against you and you have to push back just as hard. However, if you turn your body sideways, the wind or water rushes past with minimal resistance. Being nice and radiating positivity is equivalent to turning your body sideways. Others’ negative energy will flow past you so you waste no energy dealing with that situation.

 

    1. Your Feelings: How do you feel every morning? Do you wake up eager to face your day? Are you excited to get to work and do something meaningful or touch base with your coworkers? Does the thought of seeing your children get you hopping out of bed eager to face the day? Or do you get up dreading facing your boss? Want just a few minutes sleep until the kids come in and you have to deal with them? Would you rather lay in bed another hour or another day than deal with the world?

      Your feelings set the stage for the type of day and life you will have. You have to get up excited to face the day.

      Find something that you love to do and set aside time right when you get up to do that one thing. Do you like to run, meditate, knit or watch a TV show? If you know that upon getting up you will get to do that thing, it will help to set the tone for the rest of your day. Every morning I get up and go for a jog with my wife. I cannot wait to get up in the mornings and spend time with my wife for a few minutes as we both exercise and talk. This sets the energy for the rest of my day. Work seems great, my friends are fun and I enjoy all of my interactions because I radiate happiness.

 

    1. Your Energy: This may sound very similar to your feelings but there is a difference. At first when you are in a negative energy state it takes conscious effort and energy to elevate yourself to a higher energy state where you radiate happiness. As you practice feeling good and perceiving a caring world, your energy will get higher and higher.  Soon you won’t have to perceive a happy world because you will live in a happy world.

 

  1. Your Faith: What do you believe you should experience day to day life? Do you believe that life is a struggle and you need to fight your way through? Or do you believe life should be easy and you should get everything easily? This is the hardest part to truly build. Faith is the most powerful and solid way to build an easy life. Perceptions change day to day, feelings go up and down and your energy varies. Over time you can get them all in sync with your life’s goals.  But when you believe, when you have faith that you deserve the easy life and to have it all go your way, then it comes easily.

If you see yourself having bad day after bad day, try to ask yourself why you do this to yourself.  Then try to change your perception, feelings, energy and finally your faith. Once you do, you’ll be seen as one of the “lucky ones” by your friends who haven’t found the way out.

Steve

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